Kate Upton, eat Carl's Burger, or the kitten gets it!

There are many things I love in this world. Among them are boobs and burgers. Recently, a commercial for U.S fast food chain Carl's Jr combined these two glorious inventions. Here is the ad:



However, there is just one thing wrong: Feminists.

Yes, women all over the internet (Rule 1 doesnt apply in this case) are outraged by the cheap, trashy, misogynistic and sexual debasement of Kate Upton, who was forced to look as edible as the burger she was having mouth sex with in the advert.

The ever fappable Ms Upton was kidnapped by Navy S.E.A.Ls not so long ago, while making her way to church. She was then told if she didnt advertise the coronary-inducing, 890 calorie giving cheesy cow sandwhich, then Jesus would kill a kitten. What was she supposed to do? Just let Jesus decimate all those cute and innocent pussies!?

NOT ON HER WATCH! So Kate did what Kate does best...looks fucking sexual as all hell and sold the shit out of that burger!

Then came the outrage!

This picture is a small sample of the fury left by angry women on the Carl's Jr facebook page. How dare they try to sell fatty food to obese men using a scantily clad, sexy lady! Shame!! SHAME!!! We thought this was America!

Ladies, ladies, calm down. It's only a commercial. Why are you attacking Carl's Jr? If you eat there, then well you obviously don't look anything like Kate Upton and are therefore just jealous of her amazing body and her ability to give men erections. If you don't eat there, why do you even care? Did you go all spastic when those fucktards at Peta got all sexified with fruit and vegetables?
I doubt it. Why? Becuase the leader of Peta is a woman. A fucking dumb as shit, hippie twat of a woman, but a woman none the less.

So cop the fuck on. Men will always eat fast food. Men will always loves tits. The best way to sell meat to men is buy using hot, sexy ladies. That's just how the world is. Moaning about it will never change anything.

In My Perfect World

Here's a poem by me. Enjoy ^_^



In my perfect world there'd be,

An abudnance of that most glorious word, "free"


Nothing would tear this world assunder,

There'd be no need to rape and plunder.


We'd all get along, as would dogs and cats,

And everyone would wear silly hats!


Travel the world without tax or Air fare,

You could see 18 countries in a year, who'd care?


Muslim, Christian, Mormon or Jew,

Forget religion, we'd start anew!


There would be no such thing as a "Holy War",

You could spend each night with a different beur.


Or maybe you'd want to be with the one who matters,

And live your lives like mad fucking hatters.


There'd be no such thing as education fees,

And adventurers wouldn't take arrows in their knees.


Bigotry, Homophobia, these things would desist,

Because in my world, they wouldn't exist!


Disease, violence, ills which plague our mortal race,
I'd say "Fuck em all, let's band together and explore space!"


These are just some of what would be unfurled,

If I had my way, in my own Perfect World!

Photo by Thierry Legault. 2011