The Giving Lens

Wednesday, August 19, 2009


So a friend of mine just bought "Are you Dave Gorman?" and "Googlewhack" and she is now trying to find a googlewhack for herself. Which, in turn, has lead me on a similar quest (fraut with peril and dragons!)

It's mental I tells ya! The closest I have come is "Nudzh Qin" with 5 results. A cheeky combination of China's first emperor and my new favourite word, meaning: One who persistently pesters, annoys, or complains.

There were a few close calls last night, which I can no longer remember, netting me a cool and VALID 1 result. Alas, the link was invalid due to it be just a compendium of of words on some guys blog which turned out to be a list of already known googlewhacks. Failure!

Here are the rules, according to

What are the rules?
Rule Number One: Your two Googlefactors must exist in Google's view of legitimate words in this dictionary. Not your view; Google's view! Google does the work, and Google has the final word on what may be legitimate! In the blue bar atop your Google results, accepted terms are linked, and so appear 'underlined.' No line, no link, or no legitimate word = Googlejack! (As in, You've got jack, so see the FAQ :-)

Rule Number Two: Google also is the arbiter of a whack's uniqueness. Look to the right end of the blue bar atop your Google results. If you see "Results 1 - 1 of (any number),' you found exactly one hit = Googlewhack!

Rule Number Three: Google shows you an excerpt of the page you whacked. Look at that text. If it's merely a list of words (such as a bibliography, concordance, encyclopedia, glossary, thesaurus, dictionary, domain names, or plain old machine-generated random garbage), No Whack For You!

However, I shall remain vigilent in the face of such travesties and press forth. Excelsior and all that malarky. I would list my attempts here, but I do not want some poor unfortunate schleb to think he has found his El Dorado, only to be directed here, to my list of failures. Such was my fate.

And now...on with the whacking!!!

Tuesday, August 18, 2009

And now for something completely different...

Pardon me boy, is that the Chattenooga choo choo? Track 29, oh wont you give me a shine... *JAZZ HANDS*

So yeah...i was trying to sleep but I decided to blog rondomness for a bit instead. So, whats new with me...well I broke up with the girlfriend a few weeks shin and surrounding area on my right leg is feeling strange riight now. Almost like there is preassure on it. Maybe I should see a doctor...or perhaps a masseues. I cant spell massuesus. Its a funny word anyway so fuck it.

Sorry, my internal monlogue thinks its Craig Ferguson lately (cue audience laughter) so I tend to ramble on pointlessly. Its about this time most nights that I get the idea to write things. I dont know why. I run through what I would write, in my head, and think to myself why are you writing it in your head? Just get a pen and paper or type it. And Then I think No, sure I'll do it after ive slept. By then ofcourse Ive forgotten all about it. I thinking I shouldve done that with this....

I know it says my next blog will be my fav Muse songs but im a mercurial bastard and I rarely follow through on anything if i dont do it straight away.

Lets see, what else...

Im feeling quite gassy at the moment, or "Farty" as the scottish Conan guy would say. Oh, my brother and his fiancé just had a baby. Well I say they, but really it was just her. Robin spent the day trying to sonogram his head so he could see his brain on the monitor. Epic win.

I have been severly strapped for cash the last couple of weeks. So much so that i managed to pay two weeks rent using 5, ten and 20p's! Ands ive eaten fuck all. Good news for for my waistline i guess. But huzzah! My poorness is soon to end as I am getting my dole money backdated! Or so im told. The Social welfare office isnt exactly a paradign of truth and virtue.

...yeeeah, definatly farty.

Man this really is a random blog isnt it? lol

I suppose i should wrap things up. And possibly go to the toilet. So on that bombshell...Goodnight everybody!

p.s: Any spelling or grammatical errors in this blog are the result of darkness, over-tiredness, laziness and fartiness.

Thursday, August 13, 2009


The greatest band of all time is set to release their fifth studio album next month and in celebration of this, I shall post the lyrics to the song "Uprising" right here!! You lucky people! Also, The song itself!

So, enjoy the glory that is Muse....(next up, My favourite Muse songs)

The paranoia is in bloom, the PR
The transmissions will resume
They'll try to push drugs
Keep us all dumbed down and hope that
We will never see the truth around

Another promise, another scene, another
A package not to keep us trapped in greed
With all the green belts wrapped around our minds
And endless red tape to keep the truth confined

They will not force us
They will stop degrading us
They will not control us
We will be victorious

Interchanging mind control
Come let the revolution take it's toll if you could
Flick the switch and open your third eye, you'd see that
We should never be afraid to die

Rise up and take the power back, it's time that
The fat cats had a heart attack, you know that
Their time is coming to an end
We have to unify and watch our flag ascend

They will not force us
They will stop degrading us
They will not control us
We will be victorious

They will not force us
They will stop degrading us
They will not control us
We will be victorious

Sunday, August 9, 2009

Daily Fail

I have already ruined the continuity of the title. Damn lower case 'f'...

But I digress..

This guy brings the term "Drinking problem" to new and hilariouos heights

Thursday, August 6, 2009

Daily Fail

I have decided that once a day (or whenever I get around to it) I will post a video or a picture that I find, to use the parlance of our times, "Lulz worthy".

Here be the first one. What a tit. But I guess you have to admire his gumption

Vampires are Killers this has bugged me for a little while. When I was younger I watched Buffy and for the most part, Angel. And I enjoyed them. They were funny and entertaining shows. For the first few seasons at least. But ofcourse, then I grew up and got a little more sense. Vampires are supposed to be evil, soul-less blood sucking denizins of hell. Not attractive broody types who walk around in the day time, suducing teenage girls. Im talking to you Twillight author!!

I havent watched that movie, or read the book. I have better things to do. Like for example, pick fluff from my belly button, or laugh at people when they fall over in the street. This bullshit romanticising of Vampires has got to stop. The word "Vampire" originates from Kazan Tatar 'ubyr' meaning "witch." An Eastern European creature popularized in Eng. by late 19c. gothic novels, however there are scattered Eng. accounts of night-walking, blood-gorged, plague-spreading undead corpses.(taken from

Now, does that sound like a romantic creature to you? Do you really think that kind of thing would sit around in a victorian mansion, brooding all day long, surrounded by candles and reading books? No. It sounds fucking awesome. It sounds like a group of badass motherfukers who roam the lands looking to tear out the throat of their next victim.

So enough of this Interview with a Vampire, Angel, Twilight, True Blood crap! Hell, even the Vampires in Blade were gay as hell when you get right down to it.

Im with Guillermo del Toro on this one. I want my Vampires blood thirsty, disgusting, terrifying, undead monters with no remorse and no mercy!

Now, since I mentioned True Blood, I would to make a quick statement.

I have watched it. 3 episodes in fact. And all I can say is this: ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME!?

Im tempted to keep watching just to see if the gorgeous Anna Paquin gets down and dirty like everyone seems to do in that show. God damn, there is a lot of sex in that show. Sex and fuckin pityful acting/dialogue. And as for the Vampires? Whats up with the lame ass fangs that pop out? Ive seen bigger fangs on a snake for gods sake.

Alas, this destruction of a great monster is not limited to Vampires. The tragic Blood and Chocolate relegates the kick ass Werewolf to just a normal, everyday run of the mill Wolf. Just a wolf. And guess what? The story revolved around a girl who fell in love with a guy (you know the type, sensitive upstanding guy, who just happens to be a "monster" but wants to nicer then his "evil" friends) God awful. Seriously. kinda getting a bit bored with all this typing. Im hungry....

Goodnight everybody!